Life's Checklist

The greatest gift of all in a Christian's life is God's Grace. We are taught from the beginning that it is the one gift above all gifts that can't be bought or traded. It is only given, freely in love by the life and death of our Savior, Jesus Christ. As 2011 ends and 2012 begins I am also reminded that God not only gave His Son for us, but he gives us daily renewal and continually offers us the chance to be all that we were created to be. I imagine, in my goofy way of thinking, that there is a banner of each of us born that sports our name and lists all that we will be and become in our lifetime. Each triumph and feat accomplished to be checked off when completed. Only, I see my banner as having only a few things checked off and a long unaccomplished list. So that is my goal for the year 2012! I am going to worry less and live more. I am going to quit trying to lose weight and focus on getting healthy. I found something that works for me and I am going to begin the new year with two healthy meal replacement shakes from ViSalus and work to cook healthy, exciting meals for my family at night. I am also going to find time to have more fun. I have spent so much of my life caring for others and neglecting myself that sometimes it feels as if I am losing myself. I plan to make this new year a time of renewal! Part of that process is going to revolve around my business with ViSalus Sciences. This amazing opportunity is listed on my "banner" and I am going to get a check mark for growing my business in a way that opens up a whole new life for me and my family. We are headed for great health and prosperity in 2012.

Time Flies...

Yeah, I saw the date of my last post too. Let me start by telling my faithful seven followers that I wasn't in some terrible accident that prevented me from sticking to my plans or blogging. What could have been so important you say? Just life. That's all. Just life. In a nutshell, the last four months... Here goes. First of all, I had no business buying a business. That makes me laugh just to say it with the exception of all the lost money. But it's only money, right? Never mind. Slender You is closed. Yes, my precious baby that I put so much heart into just couldn't make it. Then school started back and well I don't want to sound like a cry baby, but I have two classes of twenty-two, yes forty-four in all four year olds by myself. Not an aide in sight! Yeah. Tell me! But the bright side of things is that I was introduced to something that is changing my life one day at a time. I started this amazing journey called the 90 Day Challenge. Now at first, I thought, no way. I am done with quick fixes that put the weight right back on. But I did a little research and found that by replacing my breakfast and lunch with a shake (more on this later) that I could focus on the rest of my plan to regain my health and lose weight. So I tried it and was hooked. It was easy, fast, and doable. Now you guys know that I have done Medifast before. I hated it. It was a very rigid plan with horrible tasting shakes and bars. There was no life left to live. I couldn't socialize, go to family dinners, eat out and so on. Not the same. I am so thankful that someone had the heart to introduce me to Vi-Shape Shake mix. It has been so easy to lose 25 pounds! Yep. Count em'! Twenty-Five boxes of butter if you will (just to put it in perspective for you visual folks.) I have not had one "diet" meal in two and a half months. Just sensible healthy food. And yes that includes dessert. Back to the shakes. The girl who introduced me to them said they tasted like cake mix. I was thinking...she takes drugs. You know you would think it to. But, she doesn't and they do!!!!!!!!!!! OMG! They are wonderful. I am going to be including some of my favorite recipes on my new fb page, Challenge 2012.

Breaking through the layers

Trying to change the way you handle your body at the age of forty-four is a difficult thing. For years I just tried to get by with the diet of the month or take the five year old's approach to things, if I don't look at the weight then it's not really there. Ever since I decided to really change things for the better, it has been like shedding layers. Just like looking at an onion, I know that once I peel the outer layers off and get down a row or two the vegetable itself will be worth using. I could leave all those layers in tact, peel and all and toss it in the pan, but the result wouldn't be worth anything. However, by taking the time to remove the flimsy outer skin along with the roots and first tough layers, I can go beyond what I see at first glance. If I want that onion to be at it's best, I have to do two things. I have to cut it, which is likely to bring tears. The second thing I must do so that the onion will be at it's best is to make it sweat. This totally mirrors what I am trying to do with my life. Exercise is not something I enjoy at all. Until I opened Slender You of Burleson and started using the toning tables, I couldn't walk five minutes on the treadmill. I definitely felt like crying! Today when I did my session on the tables, I did two extra tables. I didn't want to stop! I felt like that sweating onion in the pan, but I know that every time I get on the tables or on the treadmill it's like pulling off another "layer" and that feels good. It may take a long time to get where I want to be, but I am shedding old ways and acquiring new and better habits along the way.

No Excuses!

I was out of bed at the crack of 9:30 and in the pool this morning! I did my water exercises and running for an hour before I got ready for work. I felt so good just knowing that I took time for myself and did something beneficial for my body. This summer has been a slow change in attitude for me. I have come to realize that I won't be here forever and the time I am here on this Earth needs to be of quality. I visit my sister at a nursing home almost every night and watch a lady who appears to be in her early sixties scoot her overweight body in an oxygen toting wheelchair going from coffee pot to coffee pot asking every nurses aide she sees to get her "something." Now this really saddens me that this woman is in this shape at such a young age. I wish that she had turned the "ship" around when she had the chance. I have always made excuses to myself as to why I continued to gain weight, or why I couldn't exercise, but I am done with that. No more excuses! It is up to me and no one else. I have to take the helm of my "ship" and turn it around before I end up like the lady in the wheelchair. So far this month, I have lost about 6 pounds and 7 1/2 inches. ! I refuse to let this ship sink or stray too far off course.

Who's plan, really?

Every now and then when I am flipping channels I will stumble on one of Joel Osteen's sermons and every time I do, I am amazed at how he has the ability to lift me up and remind me that God has so much more in store for me. I have a tendency to get so wrapped up in just "getting life done" that I forget to to slow down and ask my God "OnStar" system if I am going the right way. I would probably make way fewer mistakes if I just took the time to ask directions instead of just setting out by the seat of my pants which is how things usually happen these days. I imagine God sitting there just shaking his head saying, "Really Holli, Really?" But then, because he is my God, he takes my hand like one of my little Pre-K students and says, "Because you are my child and because my love for you is so strong, let's try this another time. Another way." Ever since I decided to open Slender You of Burleson, I have had moments of --Oh crud! What have I done? What was I thinking? And the big one, you're fat. Who's going to exercise at a fat girl's place. Then I stumbled on one of Osteen's sermons that reminded me that just maybe It has been God's plan all along that I open this place. Maybe that's why I have experienced so many hip surgeries and life changing issues. Could those events in my life have really been preparing me to be able to completely empathize with women who can't exercise the way that young people can. Maybe those events happened to give me courage to seek out others who need the help that I need. Maybe that's why I was born when my parent's were older. So I would have an opportunity to help them in their later years when life gets hard and it's tougher to get around. Maybe that's why my baby sister, Joey was unable to speak, so that I could learn to communicate with others when there aren't even words. I have no idea what His plan for me is, I just know that I am doing something that I never even imagined doing and I am helping people that I never imagined helping. Maybe, just maybe it has been in God's plan all along.

Magazine Madness

It never fails. As I stand in the check-out line at the grocery store, I am drawn in by the covers of my two favorite magazines. They always sport headlines about the newest and best way to lose weight and of course, I buy them every time. They are always "researched" plans and usually have Dr.'s names attached to them promoting their wondrous diet book that holds all the answers to the question, "How do I lose this weight?" And every single time, I put the two magazines in my basket just in case this is the week that they publish the "real secret." The thing about it that drives me crazy is that I read the articles and plans and usually think they sound pretty good, but I never try any of them. I think the reason that I don't every try them isn't that deep down I know what I have known my whole life and that is that unless I am going to get some real exercise then I am wasting my time no matter what I choose to do. I wish I could sue those magazine publishers who lure those of us like me out there who spend our hard earned money week after week on the hopes and dreams that they snag us with. If I had every penny that I ever spent on a way to lose weight, a diet book, a diet product, or a magazine touting the newest " weight loss secret" I would surely have about $50,000.00 in the bank! I would probably be slim and fit as well. What should I do? I really like those two magazines, but if I buy them then I am just letting them lure me back to the "what if, zone" and that is not where I want to be. I am sticking with advice from Jillian Michaels who said, "If it doesn't grow out of the ground or have a mother, then don't eat it!" Do you suppose there is an M&M tree somewhere? I'm just asking???????????????????

Anyone got the time?

According to my great-nephew, Caleb, the time for our "swim date" was O:30, yep that's right, as in OHHHH thirty! He described it as the time the sun barely breaks at dawn. Well, I got up just a little later, around 9:00 and put on my swimsuit and sunscreen to get ready to hit the pool for a little water exercise and some fun before the sun when I noticed something. My suit slipped on easier. It wasn't sticking out quite so much. Could all of my little changes be adding up to something positive. Oh well, I didn't think too much about it until I walked in to Slender You today only to hear my associate, Christy tell me that I was looking "good" and asking if I had lost weight. Hum??????????? Could it be that the few real changes that I have made have really gotten me off to a new life so effortlessly? I really haven't done any real structural changes so to speak just small adjustments. For example, I have been eating at subway more than usual. I have been using the Slender You toning tables and walking a couple of times a week. I have been eating a healthy cereal combination every morning and have been slacking off the sweets. Not skipping them altogether, just not every time I turn around. And I have been making time to get in the pool every couple of days. Still drinking water. Could all these little things, when done together, produce results without feeling deprived and defeated? Only time will tell!

Is it really what's on the inside that counts?

I am sitting in my office at Slender You of Burleson looking out at the chandelier that hangs just as you enter the door. As I study it, I am struck once again by it's beauty. When I was putting together the decor for the salon, I knew that I wanted a chandelier, but the ones that I first looked at were much too fussy and frilly for the feel that I was going for. I wanted something that was simple yet complex. I wanted something that was unique, but not to brash. I kept looking and then one day I found the perfect one. A chandelier that was absolutely perfect. Well, as I study it, I am wondering if the saying, "It's what's on the inside that counts," is true in all situations. For example, when you look at the chandelier, the inside wouldn't be near as beautiful without the simple black shade that covers it. Left on it's own, the inside would still be pretty, but it would be totally different. And likewise, left on it's own, it's shade would be boring. That's kind of the way it is with people. The prettiest person with no inner beauty is not nearly as beautiful as a person with a great sense of humor and personality. In looking at that chandelier, I began to equate it with my health. What good is all the cute clothes, make-up, and jewelry if you don't like looking in the mirror because you have let your health go and as a result don't like what you see very much. When we let our insides get out of balance to a point that it messes up the outside, it changes the way we see ourselves and others. When I look in the mirror these days, I see myself as a stranger. Someone that I don't recognize. If I were left to be judged by my outside alone, I would be in sad shape. Thank goodness that I have a little intelligence, quick wit, compassion, common sense, creativity, love, desire, patience, integrity, and a sense of humor to get me by. So while the little black shade is the perfect size and shape to cover that chandelier, it is nothing without the sparkle and shine that reside just inside it. I'll keep working on my "outside" by treating my body right, but I'll try to remember that it really is what's on the inside that counts.

Independence Day

As the 4th of July came and went so did my commitment to eating healthy. I used the holiday to eat pretty much what I wanted and while it wasn't all bad, I reverted to a bad habit that I thought I had kicked. I found myself drinking Dr. Pepper this weekend. I probably had a total of 5 over a 3 day weekend. I rarely drink anything but water or tea anymore and have really been trying to keep the tea to a minimum. But there is just something about a huge cooler of ice cold drinks! This got me to thinking about freedom. Funny, huh? What came to my mind it that with freedom, comes great responsibility. If there is no responsibility the freedom can lead to chaos. I see that in the big picture of our country and in my own little bitty life as well. See, I was given the freedom to manage my own health. I was born with a healthy body. I was born beautiful. I was born full of energy. Somewhere very early in life, I decided to assert my independence in many areas. One area was watching cartoons on my own so my family could tend to my younger sister, Joey who had problems from her birth. I also could get my own soda so no one had to help me when their hands were full. I also was "big" enough to clean my plate so that no one had to get on to me for not eating. I was independent. But I learned no responsibility to balance that freedom. I got into habits of watching hours of cartoons after school and drinking sodas all day instead of water. And I kept on cleaning my plate. Well these bad habits followed me as I grew and even as an adult, I have some of those same issues. I can still sit for hours and watch TV especially if it's hot outside. As I mentioned before, I slid backwards towards the soda demon this weekend and I will still clean my plate at almost every meal. The thing about freedom left unchecked with your body is that you wake up one day like me and realize that much of your "freedom" has been lost when you don't have the stamina to climb the stairs so you can't go to a Ranger game or you can't fit comfortably in the seats at American Airlines Center so you can't go to a concert or see the Mavericks play. You realize that your freedom has been lost when you can't get dressed without sweating. I am trying to incorporate more responsibility into my life due to these issues. I am following a plan that encourages me to drink water and other healthy things. I am focusing on not cleaning my plate if I am no longer hungry. I am limiting the time I will be sedentary, as in watching TV, napping, talking on the phone and such. I am being more responsible with my health in hopes that I can lose some weight and gain more strength and stamina and therefore regain the precious freedom that I took for granted for so many years. It's not to late for you to regain your independence, too!

Am I really what I eat???

God, I hope not! If that's the case then I am a blob of salt water taffy and half and half tea. Half sweet and half unsweetened, as if that really matters after the taffy. The thing is that last week if you had asked me what I ate, I would have told you leafy green salads, grilled chicken, healthy sandwiches, strawberries and tons of water. However, sometime around Saturday morning I began slipping into old habits of junk, junk, and more junk! Don't even ask how it happened, it's all a blur to me and I was there! I was doing good, I think, until my husband, Danny had to go to the pool store. I didn't want to go in with him so I went into a cute shop that I had never seen before. That's when the backslide began. I was like a kid in a candy store. Who am I kidding, I was in a candy store. Not just any candy store, but a popcorn and candy store. What's my weakness? You guessed it. Popcorn. I can't smell it and walk away. Now, I kept my breathing in check and tried to hide the sweat on my face as I walked past barrels and barrels of colorful taffy. Taffy that just wanted to get all mixed up in a bag just for me. But, I was in control. I could look and walk out. After all, popcorn and candy would still be there tomorrow if I really wanted some, but then "It" happened. I am referring to the moment that all hell broke loose and I went from window shopper to card carrying customer of the day! As I turned to walk out of the store I heard, "Do you teach Pre-K?" It was an invitation to buy in disguise. A little girl who attends my school, was helping out at her family's business for the day. Well, who can walk out on a little girl working her first job? Not me-- that's apparent. Here comes the blur part. Somehow I managed to buy a large Dill Pickle Popcorn (I don't even like dill pickles,) a small Peanut Butter and Chocolate Popcorn, a pound of taffy, and two chocolate dipped marshmallows covered in toffee and sprinkles. I said I don't like dill pickles, but the popcorn was addicting! Seriously! How much is left this Tuesday morning? Who am I kidding? What was left on Monday morning? Not a dad-gum bit. I don't think that Bob Greene's book addresses this. Oh well, letter to self... If a little girl in a candy store asks, "Do you teach Pre-K?" Lie. Lie and answer, "Parlez-vous français" and walk away. Just walk away.

Play Ball!

I spent Sunday afternoon watching little league, All-Star T-ball games in the heat. I chose to spend the day at the ballpark because my great-nephew Caleb was playing. My husband was at work so that left me and Josh home alone so we ventured out to have a little B-ball fun in the sun. They had the photographers that do the pro teams action photos there to take pics of the little guys which was really cool. They got several shots of Caleb in action, shots that show a ball player's passion and heart for the game. What I noticed though as we flipped through the photos of all the team's shots sent a knife through my heart. There sitting in the stands in every shot was this really large, bloated lady who looked to be miserably existing while beautiful, healthy people surrounded her cheering the team on. That person was me. My heart sank as I realized what I had become. I can look back on so many times in my life when I didn't look the way I wanted. But this time it isn't just that I don't look the way I want. My life is slowly disappearing. Disappearing into a depressing and unhappy place. That is why I am hell bent on changing it. No more lose forty pounds in forty days. No more Medifast. No more, only eat this or only eat that. I know in my heart that God never intended for us to sit around all day in front of TV or computers. He never intended for us to eat processed and fast foods everyday. He created an abundance of healthy options for us all. Only some of US are too dumb to do it. I am using Bob Greene's plan which stresses, plain old good, healthy and fresh foods and daily exercise. I am using the Slender You machines every other day and walking on the treadmill everyday for 30 minutes. I am having to break up that 30 into 3 ten minute sessions right now, but that will change. You might say I am in the first inning of my own sort of ballgame right now. One that I am guaranteed to win if I just keep playing! Play ball!!!!!!

The Road Less Traveled...

Well, today I had an appointment with my rheumatologist and let's just say that the conversation started with "What are we going to do with your weight?" and ended with the knowledge that I have to go back and see her in six weeks. She pulled up my patient information and preceded to tell me that last July, I weighed 30 pounds less and that the July before that, I weighed 10 pounds less than that. What do you say to that? I was just numb to it. I think I have gotten to a point that I feel totally helpless to the situation. It's not that I don't care. I care very much, but I just have been down this road so many times in my life that it is overwhelming to take that first step again. I will take it. I just have to figure out how to make it the last time. I need a road that I can travel until I take that last breath. One that is gentle and winding, but not to curvy. One that has a few lows and a few highs, but mostly nice and even. One that has beautiful scenery and lots of other travelers. I will have better news for my doctor in six weeks, but it won't be a drastic weight loss just to make her happy. It will be a natural, normal weight loss resulting from the path of nutrition and exercise.

Slender You, Slender Me!!!

Well it's finally here. We are opening our Slender You Fitness Salon this Thursday. Now, I know that I am not the vision of fitness or slenderness if that is even a word, but I am persistent and that is why my name is attached to this endeavor. Last year, I saw this billboard driving home one night and it caught my eye, "40 pounds in 40 days," it read. I called the number the very next day and had an appointment for later that week. Upon consultation, I was sold. All I had to do was take one teeny tiny shot every morning and eat like a bird and I would lose at least a pound a day. Sounded good to me until they told me the cost. But they had a fix for that too. I could charge it to a medical credit card. I can't tell you how much I paid for it because if my husband ever gets bored and reads this thing, I will never hear the end of it. Seriously. Never. Let's just say that if I had spent the money on a cruise, I could have eaten at every midnight buffet and only gained 10 pounds. As it stands I gained my 40 pounds back plus 20 more before I had the stupid diet paid off. So I did some real soul searching and decided that maybe the reason I can lose weight but don't seem to keep it off could be that I don't get any real exercise. (Remember all those surgeries I wrote about earlier?) Well, I found this place in Arlington called Slender You and fell in love with the concept. There are six machines that support your body weight and move you through a high number of repetitions in a short time, 1 hour total! I thought, "I can do this." But the drive was too much with all that traffic. So I did the next best thing! I am opening my own Slender You Salon. I can't wait to share it with you! I still have to eat right and walk to get some cardio in, but I think it's going to change my life. Funny thing is, my husband Danny, didn't think it was possible for me to spend more money than I did with the "40 in 40" diet to lose weight...Bet he didn't count on this!

Decisions, decisions...

Well, I have just about every weight loss book ever written and if I don't currently own it, that's because it got sold in my last garage sale for a quarter. Don't tell my husband, he'll crap himself just thinking about the wasted money. See, I have a problem with losing weight. I can lose it just fine, but I always gain it back at warp speed. I'm done with that! I have to change the way I eat or I am never going to tame the beast! So, I have given it much thought and have decided on a plan that I think I can live with. A plan that is as close to real life as it gets. I have decided to adopt the Bob Greene approach to eating well. His latest book stresses healthy eating, exercise, skin care, and sleep. These are all things that I need to be focusing on because if you haven't noticed by now, I'm no spring chicken. Next decision...When to start??????????????????

Here I go again...

Long story short... I am forty-four years old and in the worst shape of my life. Long story long... I have always fought my weight even as a teenager, but when I was 29 years old, I was diagnosed with a condition called Avascular Necrosis. Basically, that meant that the blood had stopped getting to my hip joints resulting in bone on bone, also known as severe arthritis to the point that I was going to be wheelchair bound unless I had both hips replaced. Feeling as if I had no options, I had my first set of hip surgeries at age 30. I say first, because there were complications along the way and in all I have had a total of 7 hip surgeries not including the time or two, I have had to be put to sleep in order to have a dislocated hip popped back into place. As one might imagine, life changed for me in many ways. Suddenly many of the things that I had enjoyed, were out of the question for me due to my "hip precautions." I found myself becoming more and more sedentary and that along with some unhealthy eating habits, contributed to my becoming at least a hundred pounds overweight. I didn't like exercise before all my surgeries, but I detested even more after. Even walking has been miserable for me. Until now, I have thought that I would remain this way for the rest of my life, but thanks to Slender You, I have a renewed hope that I can turn this mess around. I hope you will follow my journey and experience the rewards right along with me.
Holli